Tuesday, January 12, 2010

A lil of everything:

So I went ahead and added a pic of my weight to the profile.  Thought it was a good idea on weigh in days, keeps me accountable to the reality of it all, because believe me...I could lie to people and myself by shaving off a pound or two.  I also got the idea from a blog I visit daily and was so happy to find again, In Weigh Over My Head. Definitely a very motivational person, and I love how real she keeps it.

Outside of that, I've been working really hard.  Kind of, the last two days I've had a hard time focusing on my work.  I really don't know how I manage to sit there for 10 1/2 hours and not get anything done.  But I guess its possible.  My mind just hasn't been in it this week.  I really need to learn to leave my phone alone, especially since I'm able to get on FB from it so easily. LOL.  Then I've managed to get back into Twitter.  I think its mainly because I'm bored.  You'd think I'd be using my time off to be more productive..........with I don't know maybe exercising or something.  Nope! I'm on the internets.  Go figure.

Then, I managed to get into it with friends somewhat.  I guess misunderstandings, that was real nice.  However, I apologized openly to people because well...I did act out before finding out the whole truth.  However, in the end, I still don't trust it.  Is something wrong with that?  I just don't trust anyone anymore.  I guess I need to remind myself that I can only control my feelings and thoughts.  I know a lot of people, well my IRL people think I feel nothing or don't care because I'm sooooo mean.  No, I care.  Its obvious, its on my freaking brain a lot more than they think.  I'm very vocal about how I feel and how a person hurts me.  I don't know why, I'd just rather get it out of my head.  Well, hopefully its all resolved anyways.  At least on my side.

Oh and David did Natalya's hair.......and she took this lovely photo, this is what I call the classic "Tamesha" pose.  She is definitely a character.  LOL.

So thats my lil' update so far.  As for the weight loss thing, I don't want to become obsessed with the scale.  I think that happened when I seen I wasn't losing....it pissed me off.  So I'm going to do my best not to let the scale numbers get to me, focus on what I've lost so far.......maintain and do my best in the mean time to beginning losing more.

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