Sunday, April 22, 2007

Long Time, No Blog

Well lets see, I've been stressing myself out for no apparent reason. Just letting things at the new job get to me. Not sure why either, its a job. Usually I'm not that type of person. I just learned things, the hard way. LMAO. Cause my ass is so stubborn and gotta see for myself. But hey, thats part of growing and maturing as an adult. I admit, I miss my old those who work for my old job, realize and be grateful for where you work. It could be worse elsewhere. LMAO. I'm saying my old job straight SPOILED US! Thats not saying the current one is totally bad, but I just know I'd prefer working for a smaller company than a bigger one any day. But I'm going to bare with it, do my job the best way possible and do what I gotta do. Handle my business.

Next, I got to spend two whole weeks with my baby girl. That girl is crazy! I swear she really is ADHD, hahaha. Literally bouncing off the walls, ask my girl Mo and her fam. They seen it. But she's a smart lil' girl. Everyone was surprised she just barely turned 3 years old. But thats just due to being around older kids all the time.

On another note, my daughter's father is getting on my nerves. Makes no damn sense. He wants us back together of course, we've been a part for 2 years now. I admit, I love the attention I get from him. I know he still wants me and sometimes I use that. Its mean as hell, but why not. He did a lot of horrible things to me. And I know that ain't right and I've been working on NOT doing certain things. I give him false hope, reality is...I don't want him, and I don't see myself with him. He's undependable, he's an idiot, I can't talk to him. He's very annoying and irritating most of the time. I don't know why I was even involved with him. But being young and naive, your blind to that shit. He's over here now (at my mom's), but he's really here for me. He never comes to see these kids unless I'm around. Damn shame!

Next, I've been really good...not talking to that one person at all. Emotionally things have improved a lot. I'm happy again not dealing with that drama. The only thing is, all the heartache in the past year has caused me to literally shut down emotionally. I know this and I feel it. I've met some cool people while being in Houston. Like Mr. D...he's an absolute sweetheart. I love chillin' with him, we get along great. Not sure if he wants more with me, sometimes it feels like it. But I'm not ready to be with anyone. I know I've built up these walls around me and can say I don't feel much for anyone. I don't want to be with anyone, I don't want to give myself again. I'm just chillin'.......I don't know how to describe it, like I want to feel again but its not coming out. Something is literally stopping the feelings. I have to admit, I've never had that happen before. Then there's other things happening in my life......only few know of and I highly doubt I'll put up here for the time being. I'll reveal it when the time is right to me.

Ugggh...just listening to Tony in there with the kids. He's so ignorant and ghetto. I have no patience for that bullshit. He's huggin' me now and as I type really makes my skin crawl. Just grosses me out....thank God he moved away. LMAO! I know, I'm hella mean. Like with all my other ex's....the thought of messing with them again just is disgusting. You get so infatuated with a person and then afterwards wonder what the hell was I thinking? Lol.

I'll be going home soon today, can't wait. When I'm at my mom's...just the loud yelling and noise gets to me. I can't take it. Has me ready to pull my hair out. The whole two weeks Nati was with me, I never really heard her cry...but soon as we get here, ONE DAY and she's ballin' her eyes out. I love my family but damn! Lol.

Anywho...thats things lately. No real drama, just a lil' bit of venting.

Sunday, April 8, 2007

Life Lately...

Well I'm spending time with the kiddo's here at my mom's. Damn, I definitely think Nati is ADHD. LOL. That girl was literally bouncing off the freakin' walls with excitement to see me. But I missed her and Aries both. My son is so skinny, I'm like damnnn. Lol. He got his haircut last weekend and looks so good. I need to upload the pics I took. I wanted to take pics of them doing an easter egg hunt outside but its been raining like a mofo here in Austin and its hella cold. Natalya will be home with me for two weeks, can't wait.

Outside of that, just dealing with drama regarding that idiot. He seen what I posted here and texted me...with a "FUCK YOURSELF"....lmao. He don't realize, that shit just cracks me up. Then he's on my messageboards trying to make me look like I'm a dumbass because he was playing me. Well how do you play someone that knows whats happening? I mean, I chose to be in it even after finding out he was married? Worse part is, if he was playing me...why was I still acting like a single woman the entire time? LMAO. Its called filling up time til the one you want comes along...duh! Or as my boy Mr. D. would say, just another employee. Hahaha. (Remember what I said Mr. Punk, I was waiting on you to break it off........remember, there's always a reason for what I say).

Anywho, so I'm doing pretty good in Houston. Money is tight but I know God will come through for me, he's been here this entire time guiding me through things. Just when I thought things were going to be really bad, he made a way. And I was talking to my boy Mr. Scottie about things, he always gives me inspirational words to make it. I appreciate it so much as well. Sometimes you need those positive folks in your life. I had to let go of the negative and the stress involved with them. It took some strength but I did it with my family and friends in my life. Ya'll helped a woman make it, believe that. I love ya'll so much. You know the real me....
I can't wait to get out on the floor, training is almost done. I need my overtime. Lord knows I do. Lol. There's a lot of things happening in my life this year, good things and I'm lookin' forward to them....


Laters folks....

Monday, April 2, 2007


The nerve of this bastard to call ME cold hearted ____? Well fuck him! I'm cold hearted.........I didn't break anyone's heart in two, I didn't lie about shit I was doing. I gave me to this man who lied and he's upset at me because I won't let things be how they once were. FUCK YOU JB! Leave me the fuck alone! I'm so through with your fuckin' ass.........I don't want shit to do with you. You say I'm crazy, why because I took it upon myself to find out what you were NOT man enough to tell me or any other woman that crosses your path. Yet I'm cold hearted and crazy? Did you see me call your fuckin' wife or find your home to confront her? Did you see me do any crazy ass shit like that??? NO! Even after the fact of you hurting me more...I told you I would never use that number, yet I'm the coldhearted bitch?

Do you feel anything other than for yourself? Your a selfish bastard, you will pay for everything you've done to me and even your wife and children. Your a selfish asshole who deserves all the bad that God hands your way. I'm going to pray for you and those who encounter your selfishness.

Leave me the fuck alone..........and I swear to God, this is the last time I ever mention you again on here. You don't exist to me anymore.

WARNING! To all the women who encounter this man...James Henry Bailey, Jr....he is a married man and has been since February 2003 to a woman named Erica. He's nothing but a lying munipulative selfish asshole. He claims that this woman is only his baby mama and he's helping her out in a situation. Reality is...he's married and has no intentions of divorcing her. Want proof to verify his the link below: