Sunday, September 9, 2007

The kids, the job and my baby

Well lets see whats going on with me. I'm ready to give up on school. Its a damn shame, I know. LOL. I just think, maybe its not meant for me. At least not right now. Maybe once the kids get older and are both in school. But with them coming back home and trying to get things back in order. Things stable for them from all the changes that have happened in the past year and a half. I just don't think I can deal with school right now. My head isn't in it. Just lots of stressing going on right now.

The job is going great, in fact they got rid of a lot of folks from our training class. I'm just waiting to get out on the floor, setting my own hours. Things of that nature. I'm ready to show 'em what I got! And waiting to get some damn insurance cause Lord knows I need to go to the doctor for my check ups. LOL. I'm very serious about my health and well its been since February that I had my physical. Then during the time the kids came back I got real sick, very bad upper respiratory infection. Then Natalya got a UTI and I had to take her to the ER. No insurance sucks! Soon though, especially for all of us. David is having issues with his sinuses and needs surgery. So once I get my insurance info. my ass is signing us all up ASAP!

On a side note, Aries has been acting bad as hell. Well, not real bad but to me bad. LOL. The boy knows better not to cuss at me. But he's got a mouth on him and actually has been curbing it. He used to be real lippy, but we're getting him in shape regarding that. Next, he's been lying a lot. So right now, he's grounded and basically its mostly just not listening. But I think tonight when we talked with him things go into order. We'll see, I know reality is...its gonna take some time to get both of the kids in tip top kids are going to be kids. Well boys at least. Nati isn't real bad, but I can tell Aries lying is rubbing off on her. She watches her brother and does as he does.

Next, David and I are doing good. We have our moments. Especially this past week. It was rough, REAL rough. I was ready to just say FUCK IT! But deep down dude has my heart and I can't walk away that easy. Its not like he did anything major but I know one thing....lack of communication can kill a relationship quickly. And although I don't know what exactly is going on in his head, mainly in the past week. I just know I can't have things go a certain way and continue that way. So we talked, we love each other too much to let stupid things be the reason to make us part. Plus, the way I see it.......we're too old for the bullshit of him runnin' out the house or me tellin' him we through. Thats shit we did in our past relationships and we need to confront any issues head on together to make it work. I'm tellin' ya.........its all about COMMUNICATION to have a relationship last. Once you've lost that, other things interfere and I don't want that. I love him too much...and I admit, I've had my moments where I cry. Its hard, I try to prepare myself for the possibility of getting hurt...but thats impossible when it comes to love. The potential is always there. Then there's my pangs of comes through, does. Haha, not real bad but it does. He has his moments too but to be honest, I'm totally faithful to him. I don't even try to go there with another man. Literally its only eyes for him, he may not realize how true that is....but it is. Considering my past playlistic ways. Hahaha. I love my sweety!

Then friends...well, I feel like I'm secluded from them. Don't see anyone, hang out with anyone........nada. I feel like I have no life outside of work and home. I guess thats part of getting old. I know everyone else has their own lives their handling. But I miss folks. And yes, I admit...I'm bad about keeping in contact. I do my best, thats not meaning I don't think about you.........believe it. I love my girls and the people I'm close to.

Thats about it..........

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