Fakeness

What can I say........I feel it around me at times. Whats it about? Certain people that were in my life at one time or another...or currently. Relationships that I once cherished, friendships that I once thought were closer or tighter bonds but found out were not even close. I realize we all have our own lives to lead, hell I'm living my own. But some things just bother me about the relationships and friendships I hold/held with certain people.........and I say FAKENESS is the word for it. On my end, no.......I realize I have my moments where I overreact and I'll apologize but sometimes I don't get the actions of people. You claim to be my friend, that we're close...and how you'd do this or that as a friend. But how many times must a person look to you and have you fall through? It hurts me.......maybe I have high expectations for a friendship, I know folks ain't perfect. But I can't stand being lied to.......and behind dumbass shit. Hell who am I to judge others of things, I've done my share of wrong doings and I ain't perfect still. I just don't understand it. I guess that hurts me more, it makes me not trust a person. And yet, here I am.......I feel the need like any other situation where I've been hurt by a person that I had a close relationship with........to still try to work it out, be like we were. And I feel it, its done with. I can see the signs and its NOT due to me. Its these people. It hurts because I'm trying to be the bigger person and they cut me out. I'm just not that type of person to cut someone out my life even after they do me wrong or treat me badly. Sometimes I think I'm too forgiving.....

And thats the thing.........that fakeness in a person makes me sick! I can't stand bitches like that.....fake as hell. So why do I want to still have a relationship with these people? I wish I knew.......maybe this is my revelation to finally let people like that go and out of my life for good!